Blood line or an unreliable emotional history of Englishness

Robin Ford, January 2016 after a visit to Winchester

Queen Boudicca was British
She made the Romans quiver.
Defiant is her statue
Down by old London’s river.
Although she wasn’t English,
She’s part of England’s story.
She couldn’t keep the Romans out
But ended clothed in glory.

Those Romans, they weren’t English,
Although they stayed a while
(Four centuries or thereabouts,
And set the local style.
Though Romans can’t be English,
For that would be absurd,
They left us many a monument
And many an English word.

When Roman troops abandoned us
Those left began to soften.
The Roman baths and hypocausts
Meant bathing far too often.
So when the Angles, Saxons, Jutes
Came swanning in one day,
By special dispensation
They were English right away.

Now Vikings can’t be English
This should be clear to you.
For plunder, rape and pillage
Is not what English do.
They annexed half the country
By stand-over and war,
So half of this fair country
Was under Danish law.

Now Alfred, he WAS English,
He battled with the Danes.
Negotiating treaties
(The bound’ry still remains).
Though he was stoutly English,
No doubt he made mistakes.
He never would be trusted
With looking after cakes.

King Harold fought the Normans,
An English thing to do,
And, just to make life harder,
He fought some Vikings too.
So, when he fought the Normans
His troops were dreadful tired.
He copped an arrow in his eye
And very soon expired.

King William wasn’t English
But Norman French instead.
He’s left out when explaining
How Englishmen are bred.
But when the Queen assents to
A parliamentary bill,
It’s written down in Norman French —
A testament to Will.

Those Normans weren’t deported,
They must be with us still.
It’s only one millennium
Since we were whopped by Will.
Presumably the ruling class
Is where they would be found.
Try Tattler, Vogue or Country Life,
Or maybe Horse and Hound.

We all agree; a migrant’s kid
Can truly be a Brit.
But can she be an English woman —
That’s the tricky bit.
Would she be like a Saxon and
Be English right away?
Or would she, like a Norman,
Be more subject to delay?

And what about those English
Who choose to live elsewhere,
Or join another nation,
Do other English care?
Although they have decided
To play another role,
They can’t escape the Englishness
Deep down within their soul.